Halloween may be over, but the scary season really begins today.Ladies and gentlemen, brace yourselves, because it's time for...
[Swoooosh!] TV's November sweeps! [Gong!]
Killer smoke detectors, killer food allergies, and killer child seats!
Child pornographers lurking in your bushes, food filled with rat shit, and toys dipped in Chinese lead!
UFO sightings, Brittney & Lindsay, and lesbian nuns who were molested by their mothers!
My friends...we'll get this crap for a month.
Iraq who? Iran what? Turkey huh?
President Bat Shit, Vice-President Vader, Hillary Nixon?
Don't worry about all that. That stuff doesn't bring in ratings! Mmm k?
